2 You see, the world will be filled with narcissistic, money-grubbing, pretentious, arrogant, and abusive people. They will rebel against their parents and will be ungrateful, unholy, 3 uncaring, coldhearted, accusing, without restraint, savage, and haters of anything good. 4 Expect them to be treacherous, reckless, swollen with self-importance, and given to loving pleasure more than they love God. 5 Even though they may look or act like godly people, they’re not. They deny His power. I tell you: Stay away from the likes of these. 6 They’re snakes slithering into the houses of vulnerable women, women gaudy with sin, to seduce them. These reptiles can capture them because these women are weak and easily swayed by their desires. 7 They seem always to be learning, but they never seem to gain the full measure of the truth. 8 And, just as Jannes and Jambres rose up against Moses,[a] these ungodly people defy the truth. Their minds are corrupt, and their faith is absolutely worthless.
When Narcissist- knows the truth and refuses to obey it, they are subject to any lie, any deception, any untruth that man can conjure up. “For although they pretend to know God, they neither glorified Him nor gave thanks to Him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened.
While it is tempting to equate all kinds of abuse as pretty much the same, narcissistic abuse has a few characteristics outside the boundaries of emotional abuse. Obviously narcissistic abusers are emotionally abusive, but the goals of a narcissist are significantly different from those of a person who is emotionally abusive. Knowing the difference is helpful. Narcissistic abuse requires a different approach to recovery, though the healing path from any kind of abuse is difficult.
Emotional abuse is a matter of degree. After all, we all are abusive at times. We lose our tempers, withhold affection, call names, criticize, and take our bad moods out on others. With normal maturational processes, we learn to use our words, become emotionally vulnerable, and maintain emotional intimacy at a steady pace throughout our lives. Or we don’t. But the truth remains that people guilty of emotionally abusive behavior change, as often as not.
Narcissists are a different story.
I didn’t fully understand the difference until I came to grips with the fact that my ex-husband wanted me to quit my teaching job at a local university and go to work at a local factory. It made no actual sense, but he spent hours trying to shame, brainwash, and coerce me into leaving my position. Several years before, he had taken the car away from me on what was to be the first day of my new job as an instructor at a community college. I quit that job, too ashamed to admit what happened and not knowing how to navigate the truth of the situation.
Knowing how to tell the difference between emotional and narcissistic abuse can be important. If you or someone you love is trapped in an abusive relationship, perhaps realizing the narcissistic tendencies of your significant other will give you the courage to leave.
Here are some of the key differences between the two kinds of abuse:
1. Narcissists do not change. Emotional abuse is most often perpetrated by people who are immature, who suffer from a mood disorder, or have a serious lack of nurture in their lives. As such, change can and often does occur, if people with abusive tendencies seek help. Narcissistic personality disorder is another animal altogether. As a psychologist friend of mine once told me, “People with a narcissistic personality disorder can change if they try. However, I’ve worked with many and have yet to see it happen. Neither have any of my colleagues.” Research generally agrees with this assessment.
2. The goal of a narcissist is to consume his victim. That sounds so ugly, but it is true. Because a narcissist cannot experience love on their own, they must harvest it from others. The way that they do this is to disconnect their victims from all loved ones, sowing mistrust. Then they keep the victim in a perpetual state of self-doubt and confusion. This is done purposely in order to keep their victims tied to them, serving their needs continuously.
3. Narcissists cannot love. Incapable of love, they actually enjoy causing pain. A narcissistic abuser feels no remorse and no emotion. They will argue for as long as it takes to prove their point that their victim is a terrible fault for a minor infraction because it messes with the mind of their victim. Victory is getting their victim to apologize for an infraction that does not exist. Incapable of much emotion themselves, they produce both good and bad emotions in others in order to live vicariously through their victims. Sound like a vampire? Vampires serve as a great metaphor for the narcissistic abuser. They feed on others while trying to make it look sexy or adventurous. The end is always destruction for the victim.
4. Healthy boundaries do not exist. I remember my mother asking why I could not discuss things with my ex. After all, she and my father spend their lives talking things out. But any show of emotion or resistance on my part meant further exploitation on his part. I can’t believe to this day how far I was willing to go to appease him. I spoke in a monotone for years because he accused me of being dramatic. A typical abuser will resent and push on any healthy boundaries. A narcissistic abuser will begin an unceasing campaign until all that is left of a healthy boundary is guilt on the part of the victim for having “sinned” against the abuser.
5. Narcissistic abusers seek out strong, intelligent victims. If mere control were the goal, a narcissistic abuser would look for easier prey. The stronger personality would prevail, as it often does, and that would be the end of that. But narcissistic abusers, because of their need to look good in front of others, and because they gain a thrill from conflict, look for victims that one would not normally associate with being a victim. In a way, it adds to their sense of consequence. They want to conquer someone challenging rather than merely convenient. This works in their favor. People looked at my competent exterior and could not believe the stories I tried to tell them. I didn’t look like what a victim was supposed to look like. Therefore, how could I be one?
In the end, one of the most distinctive differences between a person with Narcissistic Personality Disorder and a Sociopath is the length to which they are willing to go.
A sociopath is far more likely to inflict grievous bodily harm or other crimes in order to gain what they want. They are more calculating than a narcissist, who is by nature reactive, and may premeditate inflicting harm in advance. The sociopath is much less ego-centered and capable of setting their ego to the side in order to get what they want. Narcissists exist for the purpose of looking good to the outside world. They rarely commit actual crimes because they do not want to face the consequences.
When I faced the truth of my situation, I had to acknowledge the hopelessness of it. It felt like a failure. Years of relearning how, to tell the truth to myself gave me the ability, to tell the truth of my story to others, in hopes that they would understand how to navigate successfully out of similar situations earlier than I did.
Perhaps the best description of a narcissist comes from the book of Timothy.
They’re snakes slithering into the houses of vulnerable women, women gaudy with sin, to seduce them. These reptiles can capture them because these women are weak and easily swayed by their desires. They seem always to be learning, but they never seem to gain the full measure of the truth.
From such turn away… Unfortunately, this is the only solution to narcissistic abusers. Don’t throw your precious life away on someone who cannot love you.
When one- knows the truth and refuses to obey it, he is subject to any lie, any deception, any untruth that man can conjure up. “For although they knew God, they neither glorified Him nor gave thanks to Him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened. Although they claimed to be wise, they became fools” (Romans 1:21-22). Paul goes on in the next few verses to describe the mindset and behaviors of those who disbelieve (see Romans 1:29-31). As a result of man’s foolishness and his arrogant disdain of the things of God, “God gave them over to a depraved mind, to do what ought not to be done” (Romans 1:28). And correspondingly, “Although they know God’s righteous decree that those who do such things deserve death, they not only continue to do these very things but also approve of those who practice them” (Romans 1:32).
Isaiah puts it succinctly: “They have chosen their own ways, and their souls delight in their abominations; so I [God] also will choose harsh treatment for them and bring upon them what they dread. For when I called, no one answered, when I spoke, no one listened. They did evil in My sight and chose what displeases Me” (Isaiah 66:3-4).
The Bible makes it clear why God is sending a strong delusion in the end times: “They perish because they refused to love the truth and so be saved. For this reason, God sends them a powerful delusion so that they will believe the lie and so that all will be condemned who have not believed the truth but have delighted in wickedness” (2 Thessalonians 2:10-12). Simply put, God sends a strong delusion to those who chose not to believe the gospel of Christ. Those who take delight in mocking and rejecting Him, He will condemn.
Dealing With Narcissists* – David’s Prayer for Protection
As with all other Bible topics, the Biblical perspective on narcissism (aka insolent pride) is interwoven throughout the Bible. Therefore, the full picture is obtained through stitching together many pieces from many places in the Bible. Searching this out in blog form has the disadvantage of being worked through in “real-time” and therefore pretty raw and disjointed, but it has the big advantage of being able to link back to other blog entries as part of the process of weaving things together and providing better explanations.
Proverbs can be considered more the wisdom of God (see here), and Psalms more the heart of God (see here). To not interrupt the flow of this Psalm while still providing details that help to further understand narcissism, I have embedded links in keywords and provided notes. So please click on the BOLD words and refer to the notes below for an additional discussion on a particular insight related to narcissism.
David cries to God for protection from the wicked (narcissists, note 1 below)……..
5 Give ear to my words, O Lord,.
Consider my groaning. (Note 2)
2 Heed the sound of my cry for help, my King and my God,
For to You I pray.
3 In the morning, O Lord, You will hear my voice;
In the morning I will order my prayer to You and eagerly watch. (Note 3)
David understood clearly that God hates the narcissist and will ultimately judge him
4 For You are not a God who takes pleasure in wickedness;
No evil dwells with You.
5 The boastful shall not stand before Your eyes; (Note 4)
You hate all who do iniquity.
6 You destroy those who speak falsehood*;
The Lord abhors the man of bloodshed and deceit.
David also understood that as part of the process of dealing with the narcissist, he needed to seek God and allow God to lead him in a path of righteousness (doing what was right, even when his narcissist tormentor was doing what was wrong).
7 But as for me, by Your abundant lovingkindness, I will enter Your house,
[At Your holy temple I will bow in reverence for You.
8 O Lord, lead me in Your righteousness because of my foes;
Make Your way straight before me.
David also had a very clear understanding of who these narcissists were and how they operated
And David was confident enough in God’s hatred of the narcissists, to boldly ask Him to judge them. (Note 5)
10 Hold them guilty, O God;
By their own devices let them fall!
In the multitude of their transgressions thrust them out,
For they are rebellious against You. .Finally, David knew that those who take shelter “in God” will be blessed, and that blessing in turn will be a shield.
11 But let all who take refuge in You be glad,
Let them ever sing for joy;
And may You shelter them,
That those who love Your name may exult in You.
12 For it is You who blesses the righteous man, O Lord,
You surround him with favor as with a shield. (Note 6)
- Narcissism is the modern colloquial term for what the Bible calls “insolent pride” – see here
- Dealing with narcissists makes us groan. Its a constant drain on our very souls.
- David was praying and “watching for” the answer from the Lord because, ultimately, our answer (as in all answers), must come from Him. It might be in the form of additional wisdom, additional grace to endure, or in God actively intervening.
- Typically, there is a keyword that tips us off to scriptures about narcissism – “Boastful” is one of those keywords in Psalm 5
- David did not judge or exact retribution himself but asked God to do it (see here)
- God’s favor on us, is a shield against the narcissist. In some cases, it is appropriate to avoid narcissists (see here). But in other cases, we cannot avoid them and need to have a shield against the arrows they shoot at us.
Let Me Make This Abundantly Clear. (I Am Apolitical) While I Have a General Distaste for Politicians No Matter the Party They Belong To, I Am Unashamedly Politically a Bible Believing Conservative Christian. I Have a Severe Distrust of Government. I Believe It Is the Most Inefficient and Ineffective Way to Accomplish Most Things. While I Strongly Disagree with Liberals/Progressives and Conservative on Most Political Issues, and While I Believe Liberals/Progressives and Most Politicians Are Terribly Misguided and Naive About What Big Government Will Eventually Result In, I Strive to Not Question Their Motives. at the Same Time, While I Find Myself in Agreement with Conservative Politicians on Some Issues, I Do Not Believe Electing Republicans Is the Answer to Everything. for Me, Very Sadly, the Main Difference Between Republicans and Democrats Is How Quickly They Want to Drive the Car Towards the Cliff. Simply Put, I Do Not Believe the Government Is the Solution for Everything. I Do Not Place Any Faith, Trust, or Hope in Any Politicians to Fix What Is Wrong with the World. “Come Lord Jesus!” (Revelation 22:20)
Education is useless without the bible (Daniel Webster)
Usually, the Lord doth no great thing for or against his people, without giving warning of it before it comes.
John Wesley who said that what we tolerate in our generation, will be embraced by the next. Wesley is 100% correct! We are living in sick times.
Evil Exists So Spiritual Warfare Becomes Necessary!
- Corinthians 4:8-11 New King James Version (NKJV)
- We are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; 9. persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed— 10. always carrying about in the body the dying of the Lord Jesus, that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our body. 11. For we who live are always delivered to death for Jesus’ sake, that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh.
Satan has power over (LGBTQE-TRANS PEOPLE). The “sons of disobedience” referred to in Ephesians 2:2 are those who have not trusted Christ as Lord and Savior (cf. Acts 26:18; 2 Corinthians 4:4; Revelation 13:12). The demons are also under the rule of Satan (Matthew 12:24), and one of his titles is “prince of demons” (Matthew 9:34). Satan has a kingdom (Matthew 12:26) and a throne (Revelation 2:13). Satan is called a prince because he is a ruler and possesses the power to manifest evil in the world through influencing people and commanding demons.
HNewsWire- “All political language is designed to make lies sound truthful and murder respectable.” Just look at some of our modern-day examples: torture is “enhanced interrogation techniques”; murder is “collateral damage”; the aggression initiation of war is a “pre-emptive strike”; the theft of taxpayers’ money is a “bailout”, and the theft of depositors’ money in a bank is a “haircut” or “bail-in”.In a blatant example of Newspeak, the New World Order controllers (through the psychiatric DSM V) have tried to rename pedophiles as “minor-attracted persons” and redefine pedophilia as “sexual orientation”. This makes no sense since sexual orientation has to do with gender, not age, with whether you are attracted to males or females, not how old they are. There are even organizations (like B4UAct.org) which are claiming that pedophiles are being unfairly stigmatized for their feelings!
The Cult of LGBTQ is often a cover for child-molesting perverts
Tagged Under: abuse, children’s health, gender-confused, gender issues, gender madness, the left cult, LGBTQE, un-godly Mob, Lunacy, mutilation, transgender, Child molesting perverts LGBTQE- E For Evil, drag queens, perverts,
Tagged Under: Alt-Left, Anti Christ, bigotry, christ, Christianity, hate crime, hatred, intolerance, Islam, left cult, Liberal Mob, liberals, religion, society
Hunted by the Mob, Found by Christ
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